Every poem in this book relates to something that took place in my life and made a big change in it. It started when my husband, the love of my life, was literally fine one day and dead the next. He had diabetes and didn't know it. He had no signs or symptoms. I took him to the hospital one Saturday evening and came back home Sunday morning without him. I didn't realize until I got to the car, in the hospital parking lot, that it was my birthday. He died on my birthday January, 26. I was angry at God, I asked him for a trade. We had three children and I was afraid to raise them alone. The first poem in this book is called January 26 in reference to that day. After he died, I got very little sleep at night, so, I wrote to release angry feelings. Every situation I went through or have to deal with came out in poetry. I tried to date once or twice, over the past couple of years, but , I think I forgot how. After all, it's been a number of years since I had to. My husband and I were married for 20 years before he died. Trying to decide whether you wanted to be in a friendship or relationship is what it's all about. I think it frightens me to decide which.I 'm afraid of love, you can read about that! I've experienced some good times, some confusing times, and a lot of funny times. When I get close to a man I run him away. The book is also about being a pretty, independent woman, standing on her own and making sure every man that comes in her path knows just how independent she is. Every now and then she goes back to her long time friend, who she has known for most of her life, but , she keeps him at a distance. When he's free, she's not, and when she's free he's not. They got use to being each other's support system and wonder if their time together has passed.