Excerpt from The Land Swap: A Satire With our mawkish government, unlikely rather, Still we know unlikely things do happen. We must address ourselves upon these grounds. So philanthropic, thoughtful, too, 'shall seem Our gentle project; this will doubtless trap, The fogies of the Cabinet; then Nothing could be clearer than our plan. 'j. Clearer! Humph, excuse me, if I see The matter you propose with other eyes. 'tis clear, I grant, the ground we might get on Such grounds, but how to utilize it for Our purposes, a riddle is to me. The difficulties we now face are small Indeed to others, which Such circumstance would breed. A. Oh bah, you know not what you say: Small-pox, - small-pox, bath the word N o charms to keenly sharpened ears like yours? J. Small-pox! Charms, the horrid word You rave, Or worse, you trifle; what have we with small-pox? A. We fatten like it on the ills of men, Foul humors, - this at least we have in common. Stay, hold! Don't go! I merely jest, pure mirth Is healthful, you well know; well, small-pox Has a deeper meaning than you think. J. Speak out then quick, how dim, obscure, you have Become I cannot idle here, if such Doth suit your purpose; A Still impatient, hold, I'll make it clear: the land obtained, we will Duly with meetful gravity propose The erection of a small-pox hospital, Of course, our human nature deeply stirred The while with lofty instincts; now, I see, Your eyes begin to twinkle, you must see The sequence of such skilled philanthropy. 'the district. Isjmost suitable for villa lots, And doth adjoin a spreading populous suburb.
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