When I Grow Up: A Memoir

Ask a young girl what she wants to be when she grows up, and there’s a good chance she’ll say ‘rock star’. Ask a rock star what she wants to be when she grows up, and it gets a bit more complicated. By the early nineties, singer/songwriter and former Blake Babies member Juliana Hatfield was in a position most aspiring alternative rockers can only dream of: Her solo career was taking off. She was on the cover of “Spin and Sassy”. Ben Stiller directed the video for her song “Spin the Bottle” from the “Reality Bites” film soundtrack. She was a featured guest on “My So-Called Life”.Then, after canceling a European tour to treat severe depression and failing to produce another ‘hit’, she was dropped by her record label and spent a decade releasing well-reviewed albums on indie labels and performing in ever-smaller clubs. A few years ago, now in her thirties, she found herself quietly reading the “New Yorker” on a filthy couch in the tiny dressing room of a punk club, and asked herself, ‘Why am I still doing this’? By turns wryly funny and woundingly sincere, “When I Grow Up” takes readers behind the scenes of rock life as Hatfield recounts her best and worst days, the origins of her songs, the source of her woes, and her quest to find a new purpose in life. Writing with the same talent for lyricism and poetry found in her songs, Hatfield has produced an engaging literary memoir that will resonate with anyone who’s lost faith in a dream.

Table of Contents Chapter 1: August 1: Hoboken.Chapter 2: Vision.Chapter 3: August 2: Philadelphia.Chapter 4: In the Woodshed.Chapter 5: August 3: New York City.Chapter 6: Angel Girl.Chapter 7: August 4: North Bergen to Boston.Chapter 8: The Interview Interview.Chapter 9: August 5: Cambridge.Chapter 10: Sassy.Chapter 11: August 7: Cleveland.Chapter 12: Big Money.Chapter 13: August 8: Columbus.Chapter 14: The Story of “My Sister”.Chapter 15: August 9: Indianapolis.Chapter 16: Cool Rock Boys.Chapter 17: August 10: Chicago.Chapter 18: Guns and Roses and Me.Chapter 19: August 11: Iowa City.Chapter 20: My Idol.Chapter 21: August 12: Minneapolis.Chapter 22: The Harpsichord.Chapter 23: August 13: Minneapolis to Kearney.Chapter 24: Hair and Makeup.Chapter 25: August 15: Denver to Wendover.Chapter 26: Jeff Buckley.Chapter 27: August 16: Wendover to San Francisco.Chapter 28: August 17: San Francisco.Chapter 29: The Telecommunications Act of 1996.Chapter 30: August 18: San Francisco to Los Angeles.Chapter 31: August 19: L.A..Chapter 32: Demons.Chapter 33: August 20: San Diego.Chapter 34: Windows.Chapter 35: August 21: Tucson.Chapter 36: Begging to Be Dropped.Chapter 37: August 22: Albuquerque.Chapter 38: August 23: Albuquerque to Oklahoma City.Chapter 39: August 24: Lawrence.Chapter 40: Hunger.Chapter 41: August 25: St. Louis.Chapter 42: The Last Leg.Chapter 43: The Year of No Music.Chapter 44: How to Walk Away.