This book pairs my erotica with the true story of my intimate relationships and then adds my analysis of the main themes around trauma, emotional skills, and authenticity. Nietzsche said 'That which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger'. My story bears this out on more than one occasion. My erotica is as intense and challenging as is my life story. It is full of BDSM, fetish, and power exchange dynamics. The lines between the fantasy and my lived reality are easy to blur. I hope that this book will excite, inspire and open doors. There is light no matter how long you have been in the darkness. It is a matter of learning how to kindle the flame and light the torch. We are all works in progress, can learn from our patterns and develop new skills no matter what stage we are at in life. It remains my mission to take sex and conversations about sex from the shadows to the light.