A reassuring, empowering guide to understanding feelings of failure in motherhood, and learning how to overturn them. How to Be the Mum You Want to Be unpicks the myth of perfect motherhood and reframes what 'a good mother' looks like. Using her own experience as a mum combined with therapy expertise, psychotherapist Anna Mathur provides a toolkit for becoming a calmer, more patient and more resilient mum. Dismantling how mums come to set impossible expectations of themselves, the book offers evidence-based therapy guidance and tackles taboo subjects such as maternal rage and intrusive thoughts in depth and detail. Anna will compassionately but firmly empower mums with practical ways to learn to trust their gut, see how well they are doing, set realistic standards - and to define which standards are actually important - and therefore see what a great mum they already are. Each chapter provides strategies for reframing 'competency' in motherhood, to take the pressure off and focus on the issues that truly matter. Containing case studies, journaling prompts and tools that are simple to implement even when sleep deprived. This book will help mums understand that they are the best mum they can be, they just need to see it.