What do dogs say to their owners if they could speak? What do dogs really think about during the day? What things are really important to them? How do dogs really feel about cats, dog food, collars, humans and many other things? The answers to these and many other questions that have been Dogging humans for thousands of years are revealed for the first time in this book through the use of a new device, the "CanineBarkoTalkoGraph", that was invented and developed by Dr. Victor D. Canineorkian, Phdog, and used by him to interview and communicate with thousands of dogs of all breeds throughout the United States and Canada who provided the "Dogisms," "Dogoems," and other wit and wisdom of dogs to make this book possible. Inside this book dogs will reveal such things the following: "Water always tastes better out of a toilet and food always tastes better off the floor!" "Never criticize anyone who chases their tail!""You should spin around at least three times before eating!""Four legs are better than two!""Cats shouldn't have eight more lives than dogs!" And much, much, more!ABOUT THE AUTHORPearce W. Hammond, Sr., whose pseudonym is Dr. Victor D. Canineorkian, Phdog, the man who communicates with dogs, is an accomplished writer and dog lover. His amusing stories and anecdotes about dogs will leave readers laughing long after putting down this book. This book is a humorous tribute to dogs everywhere and should be read by every dog owner and dog lover on this planet!